Mom: Dinner last night with alcohol. After nineteen years, I think I've come to understand her, since raising me has deeply ingrained her thought process in the bowels of my mind. Both of my parents are complex people, however, my mother is the most difficult to describe. Then again, maybe it's not necessary to explain the people we love. She worries constantly. I doubt it's out of true, heartfelt concern, but more out of the idea of motherly responsibility. These past few years have been especially hard on her with my brother and I going away to college. Financially, she's also struggling, and last night I confronted her about paying for a loan she had given me a few years back for a car I bought. The idea of me giving her money caused her to break down into tears. When she gets upset, however, she has reverts to a childlike state, giggling and bouncing around, so you never know if she's joking or seriously upset. It's hard sometime not to laugh. I think it's her natural reaction to upsetting situations that has taught me to laugh in the face of adversity. «

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