When I first stepped foot on the campus of my new school a few months ago to enroll, I distanced myself from the place. I wouldn't let myself be there any more than a man in a submarine is actually standing on the bottom of the ocean. And I figured it would stay like that, because I don't want to be going to school there. I have about as much passion for my subjects as I do for a Playboy centerfold.

As much as I hate to use the term, I've been psyching myself up for the quarter this past week, telling myself it will be fun to start something new. It will be a new adventure. And I know nothing of business related subjects ? my past education being firmly rooted in math and computers ? so I'm sure I will learn something new and, hopefully, interesting. After all, it's better to learn something than nothing, and if it weren't for school I'd be sitting on my ass all winter daydreaming and playing Final Fantasy.

School is also a good distraction from myself. Let alone, my mind will run amok with escapism fantasies and delusions of romance; I'll start to get antsy and Look for Love in All the Wrong Places. And school is good in the sense that -- while it won't help me focus on the fact that I need to just calm down and let things play out in my life -- it will draw a nice chalk outline around the ant colony that is my thought process. It will cause me to focus on something other than the many paths out of this city.

Older Entries