Chrisonomicon
Journal & Weblog Write to Save Your Life August 25, 2003

Booklog

Running with Scissors by Augusten Burroughs
My mother is standing in front of the bathroom mirror smelling polished and ready; like Jean Nate, Dippity Do and the waxy sweetness of lipstick.

East of Eden by John Steinbeck
The Salinas Valley is in Northern California.

The Straw Men by Michael Marshall
Palmerston is not a big town, nor one that can convincingly be said to be at the top of its game.

Vineland by Thomas Pynchon
Later than usual one summer morning in 1984, Zoyd Wheeler drifted awake in sunlight through a creeping fig that hung in the window, with a squadron of blue jays stomping around on the roof.

Collected Fictions by Jorge Luis Borges
In 1517, Fray Bartolomé de las Casas, feeling great pity for the Indians who grew worn and lean in the drudging infernos of the Antillean gold mines, proposed to Emperor Charles V that Negroes be brought to the isles of the Caribbean, so that they might grow worn and lean in the drudging infernos of the Antillean gold mines.

Finished

 
Howard Dean for President, 2004

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posted Wednesday, May 30, 2001

Creative Compulsion

When I was 12, I remember doggedly teaching myself assembler and BASIC in an attempt to program my own computer games. At 13, I taught myself hexadecimal and binary mathematics using a book from the local library. I got my first computer at 14, and by the time I was 15, I had accumulated a wealth of knowledge in the form of computer books, software, and fellow geeks.

At 16, however, the motivation disappeared. I left the world of geekdom ? of computers, RPGs, and programming ? for hobbies more suited to the socially complex world of high school. Now, here I am, ten years later doing the same thing I started out doing. I sit in front of a computer and write computer programs day in and day out.

I remember how zealously I absorbed every bit of information I could get on computer programming. I couldn't learn enough. Now, I am full-up, and wish that I could go back in time with my current knowledge. Maybe I could actually finish those computer games that were started, but never finished due to a lack of understanding. I suppose that could be said for many things in life.

I'd want to take that idea and put it to use now that I have the know-how. I just don't have the motivation or desire I did back then. I guess that's what I really miss ? the intrigue of the unknown, the curiosity that came so naturally with youth, the exhilaration of a new discovery. We become so numb to these things with time. If only I could find some way to recapture that without artificially creating it.

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AUTHOR
Chris Paul

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