Chrisonomicon

Tuesday, March 19, 2002

Today is day one: I came out to Brandie, a coworker, over Chipotle burritos after what seemed to be an eternity of living in silence at my current employer. I've been working there for almost three years and she's the first.

It was painless. One minute, we're talking about food, the next, we're talking about her best friend being gay. You know I'm gay, right? Oh, you do? Okay. Apparently, I tipped her off several weeks back when she spotted the Sheena postcard in my cube and I told her it was campy.

It feels good to know I have an ally and a friend at the workplace, even though I always said my sexuality wasn't something that needed to be discussed with my coworkers. It's great to finally be able to talk about all the boys at work. It's like waking up from a good dream and realizing you weren't dreaming, but that these good things are real.

In celebration of a new-found friend, Brandie came over after work and I rented Toy Story 2 for her two-year-old daughter, Caitlin, while we chatted over dinner. It was an opening of the flood gates, as three-year's worth of gossip and interests and stories spilled out onto the table.

Part of me is still a little wary about the situation. It feels as though I'm making my way down a steep, rocky incline and I need to be careful who I tell or the rocks will give way under me and I'll fall for miles. I know it's not nearly as bad as my mind makes it out to be, but all I can do is take it one step at a time. One way or another, I'll reach the bottom I suppose.